Can babies be super?

I’ve been a comic book fan for a very, very, very long time so imagine my delight when I came across a legal filing that was, essentially, A COMIC BOOK!!!!

#loveitsomuch #jumpingupanddown

I’ve also learned something new about the comic book universe (or at least the legal comic book universe) — the term “Super Hero” has been trademarked. How could I not know this?

OK. I’ll calm down now and refer you to a petition filed with the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office Trial and Appeal Board on behalf of the publisher of THE SUPER BABIES that challenges trademarks on “Super Hero” and “Super Heroes.”

I had to put that title in all caps. It should never be written any other way. It’s also in all caps in the petition.

“The goal of THE SUPER BABIES is to deliver classic children’s stories while promoting charity, teamwork, and adventure,” the petition said.

What else would super babies do? Regular babies are notably uncharitable and refuse to work in teams.

The petition came about because DC opposed a trademark application from Superbabies Limited, a British publisher. It seems that Marvel and DC, the giants (or Hulks, Galactuses, Thanoses) of the comics world, jointly registered “Super Heroes” as a trademark.

According to Superbabies, “DC had asserted the exclusive right to use ‘the prefix SUPER followed by a generic term for a human being.’”

Hmm. Time for a creative exercise. Come up with as many non-generic terms for human beings as you can. I’ll start.

Super George

Super Bank Teller Named Albert Who Walks with a Limp

Super Courthouse News Columnist.

(I might have to fight Kahn and Girdner for that last one. It could be an epic battle in our first issue.)

But I digress (really badly). I brought this petition to your attention because it’s filled with comic book art and delightful to look at. This is a legal document lovingly crafted by a comics fan having a great time. There is page after page of classic scenes and covers that may or may not prove any point.

More lawsuits need to look like this. Lawyers out there: Please include more art in your filings. You’ll engage the public in the part of the legal system that doesn’t involve porn stars and you’ll save my sanity.

The writing on the wall. Be careful what you post on Instagram — cops may be watching.

We learned this the other day in a ruling by a federal judge in Seattle that held that a temporary concrete wall is “a traditional public forum.”

How is this possible? Well, traditions can evolve very quickly and a wrong decision can start a weird chain reaction.

According to the ruling, it started when a couple of guys went for a walk and one of them spotted a charcoal briquette on the sidewalk. Who can resist that?

So he picked it up and “in what he calls a ‘very spontaneous act,’ he wrote the words ‘PEACEFUL PROTEST’ in charcoal” on a temporary wall outside a police station.

A police officer saw this on a security camera and dispatched cops to arrest the peaceful protestor for destruction of property even though it was a temporary wall that wasn’t destroyed.

The protestor’s friend saw what happened and decided to add to the graffiti. Another officer saw this on a live Instagram feed and rushed to make another arrest. And then another friend came out to add more graffiti and a cop spotted that on Instagram … and it all happened one more time after that.

Instant tradition!

This was followed by four years of arguing in court — so far.

The lesson to be learned from all this: Responsible city officials must keep charcoal off the streets. It’s way too tempting.