Crybaby, crybaby!

It’s never polite to tag people with demeaning names, but “crybaby” had a social purpose, and a reasonable one. The message was: Look, there are rules here, and you’d better learn them if you want to play with us.

That’s why we never called girls crybabies: Because girls didn’t have to play by boys’ rules, unless they wanted to, in which case, sure, we’d let them play. And in my memory, no girl who volunteered to play by boys’ rules was ever called a crybaby. Because after all, she’d dared to do it.

None of the cool guys would hang out with a crybaby. Nor would the regular guys who wanted to be cool. Which led to the understood rule: Don’t be a crybaby.

Being a crybaby was worse than being a liar. Everyone lies, even cool guys. You could survive being caught in a lie, but you could not survive for long as a crybaby.

So why is it that when Don the john threatened to prosecute Google for “revealing and displaying bad stories about Donald J Trump,” and called Google’s business model “an ILLEGAL ACTIVITY,” and vowed to “request their [Google’s] prosecution … for this blatant Interference of Elections,” why did no one stand up and shout: “Crybaby! Crybaby!”

And why did it take The Guardian, an English newspaper, to report this story before any U.S. newspaper dared touch it? I haven’t seen one dare to touch it yet. Cowards, all of them. (Jimmy Kimmel had more guts than the Times and the Post on this one.)

Humor me for a moment, as I cannot inject any humor into this true story.

Courthouse News is a legal newspaper. Many of our readers are lawyers. You do not need me to explain that Congress makes the laws; the Supreme Court interprets them; and the president must “take Care that the Laws be faithfully Executed,” under Article II of our Constitution. (Capitalization by our Founders.)

The president may not, under our Constitution and legal system, prosecute, on his own hook, his presumed political enemies, for “revealing and displaying bad stories” about him.

Pardon me for quoting Curly Howard, but “Sheesh!”

Plus which, Google did not write any of those ‘bad stories.’”  Google provides links to stories published by other organizations. And Section 230 of the Telecommunications Act of 1996 immunizes Google for doing this.

So. As if we didn’t know already: Don the john* is not only ignorant of the law, he doesn’t care a damn what the law is, and is willing, if given the chance, to order that more than 4 million employees of the Executive Branch hunt down and prosecute purveyors of “bad stories” about him.

Sounds like Al Capone to me. Or Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin. Or Xi Jinping. Or the Taliban. Or Big Brother.‡ And Hitler.

This is not mudslinging. Historian Ralf Dahrendorf showed in his book, Society and Democracy in Germany  that once Hitler greased himself into power, on Jan. 30, 1933, it took der Fűhrer  only 30 days to cram enough legislation through the German Parliament that everything Hitler did after those 30 days was legal, in Germany.

Kind of makes you long for a do-nothing Congress, doesn’t it? Or not.

Please recall that our own incipient Fűhrer  (leader, or guide) has promised to be “a dictator on day one.”

So what can we call this? Efficiency in government?

Trump promises to do in one day what it took Hitler 30 days to “accomplish”?

And who are Trump’s Jews?

“Liberals,” whatever that means.

Democrats, of course.

Who’s next?

Take me, Herr  Fűhrer.  Throw me in jail. Shut me up.

But at least I wrote this, and got it published before you tried to make it illegal.

You crybaby.

** A john (lower case) in American slang refers to a man who frequents prostitutes.*

‡ War is peace. Freedom is slavery. Ignorance is strength.